I woke up to sunlight streaming through the window.

  My first thought was that I'd slept well. My second thought was where am I? The room appeared... different.

  I sat up and looked around. The room appeared to have been fully cleaned. My stuff was neatly arranged against the wall. My dress was no longer in a pile in the middle of the room, but neatly folded next to my boots.

  Huh?

  A flicker of movement in the doorway caught my eye. Or did it? I wasn’t even sure I’d seen anything. Was I hallucinating?

  Then the skrzat peeked around the corner, scowled at me for half a second, and disappeared.

  I stared after him. “…Thanks? I guess?”

  I yawned and took in the room again. Everything appeared to be spotless. How was that even possible? I wondered if there was a way to get more of these house spirits into the cathedral. A handful of them would probably have the place looking like new in no time.

  Maybe I should ask him to invite some friends? Though it was hard to imagine he had many, considering the scowling.

  Maybe I should check for more bwotniks on the way to the town. See if they were also hoarding convenient little cleaning spirits in their chests. Worth keeping an eye out.

  Speaking of, Kasia and Vasil were probably waiting for me.

  I got dressed and headed to the kitchen. Kasia was sitting at a newly crafted table, eating what looked like leftover rabbit from last night. I glanced at the hearth, but the skrzat wasn't sitting in the flames this time.

  Kasia noticed me looking and held out a piece of meat. "Want some?"

  "Sure." I sat down across from her and took it. "So, the plan is we find some crafters. Maybe learn a few runestone combinations. Get you some proper boots."

  Kasia’s eyes widened. "I get boots?"

  "Of course. I feel bad I gave you those sandals." I took a bite. "After we get you sorted, we'll have a nice meal somewhere. Maybe find some sheep to take home with us. Then we kill some inquisitors and run away really fast before they realize what we did and kill us."

  She stared at me.

  I turned to Vasil, who was sitting on the edge of the table. "What would be a good place to do that?"

  He sighed. "Berava has an inquisitor outpost. It's relatively isolated from other towns."

  "Perfect."

  "Are you sure you want to do this?" Vasil asked. "The town isn't large, but it has a higher concentration of inquisitors than most. This will be significantly more dangerous than a small village. Especially if you run into someone with an identify skill, which inquisitors are more likely to have."

  I frowned. "Are people just walking around casting [Identify] on everyone?"

  "No. But you are... you. You are not particularly good at blending in. Or keeping quiet."

  I laughed. "I'm great at blending in. And I have this mask now." I gestured at Karn's Face sitting on the table. "What could go wrong?"

  "A great many things," Vasil said flatly. "You could die. Kasia could die."

  "We'll be fine."

  He sighed. “I just think you’d be better off if you tried helping people somehow. Make the public love you.”

  This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.

  I raised an eyebrow. “How am I going to help them? All I know how to do is shoot things… and people.”

  “You could offer protection. Escort someone. Take a contract, kill a monster. Deal with bandits. These outposts always have a quest board.”

  “Yeah… that sounds like a lot of work though. And inquisitors drop better stuff than monsters, and give more experience.”

  “Just think about it, alright? It would help your cause if people knew you were a good person.”

  “Why wouldn’t they think I’m a good person?” I scoffed.

  He looked as if he was carefully considering his words. “Well… you have shot a sizeable amount of people.”

  I threw up my hands. “Self defense! I’ve never shot anyone who didn’t deserve it.”

  “That may be true, but there is a stigma attached to killing people.”

  “Oh yeah? Why is it fine for the Church to kill everyone then?”

  “Who’s going to stop them?”

  I pointed at myself. “Me. At least, when they try to kill me.,” I nodded to Kasia. “Or Kasia.”

  She smiled.

  Phisto walked into the kitchen just as I stood up. “Alright, everyone ready to go?” I asked.

  Phisto turned right back around and walked out of the kitchen.

  ***

  We were making our way through the swamp when I turned to Kasia. "So, did watching me upgrade my skills give you any ideas for what class you might want? Learn anything useful?"

  She hesitated, looking a bit uncomfortable.

  "What?" I asked.

  "Well... no, not really," she said quietly. "You just... told us your stats and then walked away."

  "Oh." I paused. "Right."

  Maybe that was pretty dumb of me. I clearly need to work on my teaching skills. In my defense, I was completely new to this and had no idea how to teach anyone anything. I liked to think I was good at most things, and while I wasn’t perfect, I was operating within a respectable margin of error.

  "Let me actually explain what I'm doing. So basically, I'm building around fire. A lot of my gear now boosts Fire Resistance and Fire Damage, especially when I'm on fire—which sounds bad, but isn't because I'm sort of, but not really immune to fire damage now—I get massive bonuses to movement speed, attack speed, and damage."

  I gestured as I walked. "And the [Reload] upgrade? Every bullet I create now hits way harder and steals Life or Barrier. So I can heal myself while fighting. It's all about synergy, making everything work together instead of just grabbing random powerful items."

  Kasia nodded slowly. "So you picked things that... make each other better?"

  "Well, kind of. I found them. Okay, maybe I didn’t find them, I just killed some people who happened to be wearing them and took their stuff. And I combined that stuff to make a build that’s better than theirs."

  I glanced down at my amulet. “Actually, having [Mana Shield] would be really good right now. This amulet restores 10% of my maximum mana every kill. Karn’s Face has 35% of damage taken goes to mana. Flamegrip has 5% mana stolen per hit. The Russet ring converts 12% of damage into barrier and the Ring of Kindling has a chance to ignite enemies, increasing my damage and refilling my barrier at the same time.”

  “So, [Mana Shield] will be your next skill?” Vasil asked.

  I nodded. “I think that would be the smartest choice. It would seriously increase my survivability, using my greatest strength—my large manapool—for defense. Especially now I have so many ways to get mana and barrier back.”

  “Very good, Hecate. Smart thinking.”

  Obviously smart thinking. What other kind of thinking did he think I did? Was he implying I sometimes did dumb thinking? Did he think I was some kind of idiot?

  “Speaking of idiots,” I said.

  “Idiots?” Vasil asked.

  “If you’re so smart, how come you haven’t found a way to turn back into a man?”

  “I do know how to turn back. You either dispel the curse, or kill the one who cursed me.”

  Yeah. Either was probably going to be rough. This kind of magic was still wayyy above my paygrade. I might never even be able to dispel the curse. So the only solution would be to kill the sorceress. The super powerful sorceress.

  “So… what if we can’t find a way to turn you back?” I asked.

  “Then I’ll be a frog forever.”

  “Mm. That would be unfortunate. Unless [Frogbag] has other skills besides just holding stuff. What else you got?”

  “I don’t know. I’m level one.”

  I snorted. “You’ve been a [Frogbag] for like a million years and you’re still level one?”

  He narrowed his eyes at me. “I can’t exactly go out and get experience, can I?”

  I supposed not. Maybe I was being unfair to him. Maybe I shouldn’t have let him calling me an idiot get to me. Alas, sometimes even my famously mild temper gets tested. Now that I thought about it I was a little bit disappointed in myself. Though in my defense, he did call me stupid.

  Did he call me stupid though? Maybe he was actually just giving me a compliment. Maybe he was actually praising my intelligence.

  But then again, if my intelligence was so obvious, why would he need to point it out? You don't congratulate someone for breathing. You don't praise someone for having two eyes. So if he felt the need to specifically mention my smart thinking, didn't that imply he was surprised by it? That he expected dumb thinking?

  Or was it such high level thinking that he was surprised by the sheer brilliance of it? Yeah, that made more sense. People got overwhelmed around me all the time.

  I smiled. “That’s alright, Vasil. Thank you.”

  “Huh?”

  I crouched down to give him a little pat on the head, but heard a sudden rustle in the canopy above.

  My eyes shot up. Arrows. A full volley, already in the air, coming straight for me and Kasia.

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