Tokyo went next. Another seemingly normal morning commute; replaced, in a blink, by another white plume of fire ten mountains high that danced and burned till the whole city was ash. Katie did not watch the broadcast today. She had better things to do than feel sorry for people she never knew on a continent she’d never visited. She’d always wanted to visit Japan one day. To stand atop Tokyo Tower and yell out her name, eat katsudon rice and drink beer at midnight at a shop on wheels, watch cherry blossoms scatter in the spring breeze like those cartoons she used to watch as a kid. And now, it was nothing but ash.

  The lady on the radio talked at length about the strength of Japanese people and how this wasn’t the first time they’d lost a city in a blink and that they’ll survive this too. She talked about how the American President had expressed his sympathies and how it was time for the whole world to come together and quote “nail that bug sunnovabitch”. The Japanese Prime Minister had refused comments.

  Katie wondered if the Bug Thing was following some sort of pattern. One city per continent or something like that. Was there a deeper reason to it? Maybe it had been through this rigmarole so many times that it needed a way to keep things fresh. It certainly didn’t seem like the creature’s first rodeo. From the brief moments she’d seen it on TV, the Bug Thing didn’t - at all - appear unnerved by the fact that it had just decimated an entire city. Well, an entire Manhattan, but still. Was it afraid of its power? Did it take joy in the act? Or was it, like she’d guessed earlier, just doing a job? A formality to be gotten over and done with.

  A single death was a sad thing. Hundreds were a tragedy. Millions, a genocide. But billions? Trillions? Numbers on a screen. Statistics, not even people. That, Katie guessed, was what humans were to the Bug Thing. Statistics, to be reported to corporate. Nothing more.

  She didn’t know whether that made her feel better or worse. All she knew was that she’d been driving all morning, her backside was hurting like a bitch, but finally, after all that traveling, she was within spitting distance of her destination: the town of Gentle.

  From what she’d read, everyone and their mother in that town was born with a silver spoon up their ass. It was a small place, barely a couple hundred people. But a good number of them had inherited some gas plant or gold mine or the other and spent most of their days kicking back and unwinding in the desert sun, watermelon juice in hand and some poor bastard stand over to wave giant fans for them as they jacked off by the pool.

  Katie found them harmless enough. A bit religious, but mostly harmless. Apparently, the people of Gentle had never tried to expand their business ventures. As long as their folks got paid and they got to laze about in the sun all day, they were content with never moving a muscle.

  But then, Manhattan happened and it was as though a fire had been lit under their collective asses. They thought God was punishing them for their sloth or lack of ambition or whatnot by setting the world on fire. And when the Bug Thing revealed itself on camera, it was as though God himself had descended from the heavens. And then, when they heard about its whole ‘heal the world’ schtick and the plan to eliminate humanity one city at a time, they were convinced that this was a Savior come to save humanity from its own vices.

  So, it came to be that within the hour of the announcement, the good people of Gentle accepted the Bug Thing into their hearts, tore down the cross and all the Christian memorabilia from the town church, and converted it into the Church of the Savior. The priest was run out of town by men wielding pitchforks but that’s not important.

  What is important is that the sweet town of Gentle was now the premier home to the freshly anointed Cult of the Savior. A bunch of impressionable rich people with nothing to lose and everything to give in the name of some weird alien bug? Katie had hit the jackpot.

  She pulled up some ways outside of town to give it the once-over from a distance. The first thing that caught her eye was the church in the center. The door had been freshly painted over black and purple with tiny splotches of red, green, and blue dotted around the edges in large concentric circles. A group of young men came out the back entrance carrying a large crucifix while more men and women followed behind them carrying wine glasses, bibles, and other materials no longer fit for the Church of the Savior. Katie watched them for a while, engrossed in their new routine with big happy smiles on their faces even as they desecrated the very building they’d once prayed in.

  The town was built around the church in concentric horseshoes with the few commercial buildings like the general store or the copier being near the church while the residential areas were off to the edges or the outer perimeter. So, the business was close to the church. Good, Katie thought. People were already accustomed to buying shit near the church.

  She looked around for a while longer. It was an old town. Almost deserted, in a way. The few solid roads around the church looked as though they hadn’t been repaired in years. The wood on the general store looked ready to drop with termites. The police station had cobwebs spiraling out of its multiple broken windows. The phone service place looked clean enough. Although, the sign that was supposed to read “We help you to find your perfect plan” was missing a few letters and just read “Hel to U” now.

  Did these people really have money? Her eyes shifted to the residential area and the view was an answer in itself. Forty-eight mini bungalows splayed out side-by-side in a semi circle around the inner ring, all freshly painted with front yards far bigger than her RV. The wood was fresh, the lawns were fresh, and, based on the happy music practically radiating out of the buildings, the people were fresh too.

  It was perfect. Kate stepped back in and got ready for ready for phase one of her master plan: presentation. She brushed her hair till it was all nice and flowy, did her make-up as best as she remembered from Cousin Jeanie, put on her best coat-suit which was a little tight around the waist but otherwise not too shabby.

  By the time she got done, she was Katie Marsh, Proper Legitimate Business Owner-to-be. She’d already rehearsed her sales pitch in her closet mirror a bunch of times but she still gave it one last attempt. “Hi, I’m Katie Marsh. Say, how would you like some help spreading the word of our lord and savior, the Savior from beyond the stars? With just a little investment, I can set up shop right here in the beautiful town of Gentle and help preach the gospel of our magnificent Savior with the physical means to the deliverance of the salvation that he has promised us.

  “Just think about it. Think! A random person walking down the street wearing the insignia of the magnificent Savior, spreading his divine message wherever he goes. Think! A family drinking from mugs marked in the symbol of the Savior, turning all liquids that pass through it into nectar, practically guaranteeing a seat in Heaven once the Savior completes his mission. Think! A banner so large it is visible from the sky carrying the message of the Savior: heal the world. Now, imagine that banner displayed across the front of your house. Nothing could be more pious.”

  Katie beamed at herself in the mirror. Things were about to turn around for her. The moment she left her vehicle, her life was going to change forever.

  When Katie unlocked the door and stepped outside the RV, the Bug Thing was standing in front of her, arms crossed, and all seventeen eyes staring pointedly in her direction.

  Her heart stopped, her vision became blurry, and before she knew, she lost consciousness and fell.

  When Katie came to, she was sitting on the couch inside her RV. Her head felt ready to burst. And what was that weird dream she had earlier? God, she must’ve been exhausted from driving all day all night. She was so obsessed with this Savior-shit that she was starting to hallucinate. She rubbed her eyelids and lifted herself off the couch. Maybe she was trying to rush things too much. She could afford to take it easy a little while, right? She had the time. She just needed some rest. Yes, just a little rest and she’d be back on her feet, ready to con these delusional suckers for all they were worth.

  A soft yet firm voice echoed from her side. “One person’s delusion is another person’s faith, Katie Marsh.”

  Before her thoughts could connect from one neuron to the next, Katie threw haymaker at her unknown assailant. Right as her fist was about to make contact, the punch came to a complete halt and Katie was thrown across the length of her RV till she crashed atop the steering wheel.

  “An understandable response.”

  The glare of the midday sun from the overhead window near blinded Katie but there was no doubt in her mind. Even as the assailant slowly walked towards her, head almost concealed by shadow, she knew exactly who it was. Or rather, what it was.

  “I am designated Safi Yo’or. But you already know that. Don’t you, Katie Marsh?”

  Seventeen vicious bug-eyes stared daggers at her as drool from the mouth appendages slathered her face. Katie did not dare to move a muscle. Her heart was beating out of her chest. Her limbs were noodles. And she was almost certain she’d cracked a few ribs. But even if she had all the strength in the world, there was no escape.

  The creature was going to eat her alive. She wanted to cry and plead and beg for mercy but her lips wouldn’t stop quivering. Her limp body slowly slid off the steering wheel and crashed onto the floor with a painful thud. No, this was not the end. She was not going to die. There was still hope. With what little strength she had left, she lifted her torso off the floor, bent her knees, and bowed before the Bug Thing, crying and wailing the entire time. “Isosurrhyy. I sosurrhyy.”

  The creature stepped back and tilted its head in confusion. “Forgive me, I do not speak that language. Could you use English, please?”

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  Katie wiped her tears and sucked in her snot and tried again. “Imsosorry. Imsosorry. Pleasedonteatme. Imsosorry.” She was trembling in every limb. It was all her fault. Her fault for being so dumb and selfish. The world was ending and here she was, trying to make a quick buck. Why did she have to be so selfish? Why couldn’t she be more like those activist girls from TV? All those people were dead and she couldn’t even cry. But when it was her own life on the line? That’s when the waterworks wouldn’t stop coming. She was so fucking selfish. Maybe, she deserved to be eaten by the weird alien bug monster.

  “I… don’t understand,” said the creature. “Eat you? Why would I eat you?”

  Katie slowly lifted her face off the ground, eyes still red and swollen with tears. “Y-you’re not here to eat me?”

  The Bug Thing tilted its head again. “Eating you serves no purpose. It is irrelevant to the directive. Ergo, I will not eat you.” It outstretched a hand to help her get up.

  Katie grabbed it without thinking and was pulled off floor like she weighed nothing. “T-thank you.” She took a step back to observe her hand and see if it hadn’t developed any punctures or bite marks or anything like that. The creature’s hand had felt warm. Gentle, even. Her head was a bit clearer now.

  “So, it wasn’t a dream. I… really saw you. Outside, I mean. God, I can’t believe it. It’s really you.” She needed to a place to sit. There was an alien in her RV. An actual honest-to-God alien from outer space. She’d just shaken an alien’s hand. She needed time to think. Time to process this shit. It was one thing to see this… this thing on TV but to have it two feet away from her. The creature that had just turned almost two entire cities to ash was standing in her RV. She had no words to do justice to the situation at hand but she tried her best. “Holy fucktacular jizzlesauce.”

  The creature nodded. “I attempted to greet you earlier but you fainted.”

  “Right, yeah, sorry about that.” Katie sat down on the driver’s seat and turned it around to face the Bug Thing. She gestured for it to use the co-driver’s seat.

  The Bug Thing nodded and sat down next to her, seventeen multicolored eyes independently moving around observing her every tiny movement. “It is normal for aliens to have an adverse reaction to other sentient species, especially if they have yet to discover interstellar travel.”

  “Alien?” She raised an eyebrow before gasping. “Oh, right! I guess, for you, we must be the aliens, yeah. So, I hate to hurry you along Mister uhh…”

  “Safi,” it said. “I am designated Safi Yo’or. You already know this.”

  “Right.” She clicked her tongue. “Of course, Safi. Can I call you Safi? Not that I mind hosting your uhh awesome presence in my uhh this here humble abode, I reckon you didn’t come all this way here without a reason. Not that you ain’t welcome, of course!” She laughed nervously. “It’s just uhh I bet you had your hands full with that Boom or Bust shit.”

  “The directive is the directive,” said Safi. “The order of disqualification is pre-determined. My part is limited to the execution of the directive in case of failure of compliance. Which is to say, the inability to meet the requirements of the directive.”

  So I was right on the money, thought Katie. The creature was just doing its job. “Right. That whole ‘heal the world’ shit,” she said.

  “The requirement is simple and easy to understand.”

  “Is it?” she asked.

  “Which part confuses you?”

  “Just… all of it?”

  “Oh?” The creature paused. Its mouth appendages wriggled aggressively. It rose from the seat and walked all over the RV with its hands behind its back. It walked straight, it walked in circles, and walked in weird criss-cross patterns before finally returning to its seat. Katie could not read its expression but she could’ve sworn it seemed upset. Distraught, almost. It spoke at last. “Curious.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “We have… never run into this issue before.”

  “Oh. So, what are you gonna do now?” asked Katie.

  Safi seemed to speak with hesitation. “I suppose… I will continue to follow the directive.”

  Katie said nothing.

  “You object?” Safi questioned.

  “Object? No, not really.” She scoffed. “Like my Uncle Jed used to say: you gotta do what you gotta do.”

  It raised several of its eyes at her. “Even if the outcome is exactly what I promised?”

  Katie shrugged. “Hey, I’ve had to do jobs I ain’t particularly proud of either. I’m no one to judge.”

  “I see.”

  “I guess I’m more curious about that whole requirement thing. I thought you’d rather communicate what you mean before going all nuclear on entire cities.”

  Safi exhaled. “For all the planets that I have visited under the Galactic Council’s Boom or Bust Development Program, there has been but one commonality: they all knew what ‘heal the world’ meant. It was designed to be a simple question because most people are aware of what ails their planet. They know what the biggest problems are, what the great evils are, what issues must be prioritized and why. They have known for multiple lifetimes and they know exactly what needs to be done. The disqualifications are simply a push to incentivise development.”

  “And how many of these uhh disqualifications does it take before they actually, you know, heal the world?”

  “Two, for most worlds. Three, for especially backwards regions.” It nodded impatiently to itself. “Yes, even on the worst planets that I have visited, three disqualifications from existence are usually enough to prompt the dwellers to begin drafting action plans. But you tell me that the dwellers of Earth simply do not understand what needs to be done.” Safi lowered its head. The mouth appendages wriggled and vibrated as it sighed once more. “Are you certain?”

  “I listened to some real smart scientist guys earlier and honestly, they had no goddamn clue what you was on about, love. Even if they did, it’d be years if not decades before we manage to put the right people in charge, people actually willing do that shit. Sorry.”

  “No, do not apologise, Katie Marsh. You are not to blame for the failures of your species.”

  “So, what are you gonna do now?”

  Safi shook its head. “The directive must be obeyed. I shall continue with the disqualifications until the outcome changes.”

  “And if it doesn’t?” she asked hesitantly.

  Safi rose from its seat. “We must hope for the best. I’m sure humanity is capable of great change, even if it doesn’t know it yet. But…” Safe walked over to the couch and TV set-up. It was tuned to a news channel. The President of the United States was bragging about how he had single-handedly solved the alien crisis and how it was time to redouble efforts to curb the real threat to the nation: the illegal immigrant population. Safi’s claws dug deep into the TV set. It groaned weakly. “No, we must keep hope that they can still change.”

  Katie gulped and laughed a bit uneasily. “So umm… You didn’t answer my question from before about what brought you here?”

  Safi appeared to perk up at those words. “Oh, right! Yes. Forgive me for tiring you with my troubles. It’s lonely work, this job of mine. I don’t normally get to discuss these… matters with people.”

  “Hey, totally get it, man. Overseas travel is a bitch.”

  “Hmm,” said Safi. “You are an interesting specimen of your species, Katie Marsh.”

  She snorted derisively. “You know it, hun.”

  Safi sat back down in front of her. “Most alien species when confronted with their own mortality tend to flee or attempt to fight back. You, on the other hand, are neither. You have - what’s the English word - apathy for your species. Beyond fear of personal safety, of course, you are not terrified or rageful at the prospect of your species’ extinction. It’s really quite novel.”

  Katie leaned forward in her seat, arms-crossed and eyebrows raised. “Is that why you came here?”

  Safi nodded. “That is part of it, yes. My real target is the town of Gentle, which seems to have had the most curious reaction to my arrival. For reasons beyond my understanding, they appear to celebrate the destruction I bring them. It’s really quite puzzling.”

  Katie scoffed. “And that’s what you came here for? To understand it before you blow it all to smithereens?”

  Safi chuckled. “I sense judgment in your tone.”

  “No, not judgment. God, no. Just curiosity, is all. Like, fill me in here. In all likelihood, you are gonna wipe out all of humanity in time. So, why bother trying to learn about them?”

  Safi took a deep breath. It seemed to stare out the tea-stained glass of the RV. Katie followed its gaze. Far in the distance, under the shade of the newly anointed Church of the Savior, children were playing with sticks. Two of them were dueling, pretending the sticks were swords. Every once in a while, one of the kids would stab the other and that kid would fall flat on the ground. Disqualified. Moments later, another kid would pick up his stick and continue the fight.

  Then, another kid would fall, then another, and another, and another. But the fight would keep going. All of a sudden, a kid wearing a helmet shaped like Safi’s face showed up and within seconds, all the other kids dropped their weapons and fell to their knees. The kid wearing the helmet touched them one-by-one and they all fell, disqualified, one-by-one, until the helmet-wearing kid was the only one left standing. The others carried that kid on their shoulders, laughing and screaming and chanting “Savior! Savior! Savior!” over and over and carried that kid into the church.

  Safi’s mouth appendages vibrated with pent-up frustration. It seemed almost tearful. “They call me the Bringer of Death wherever I go. If I’m not met with screams, I am greeted by stones and crossbows. It is… nice to have a different reaction, for once. If only for a moment, I would like to savor it.”

  Safi caught Katie smiling and staring at it. It coughed to regain its composure. “Of course, this does not change anything. In the end, they too will be disqualified from existence. If humanity does not manage to meet the requirement that is.”

  Katie had no words. She simply sat there slack-jawed staring at her visitor from beyond the stars. Extinction. The Bringer of Death. The end of her species. But when she looked past its multi-colored eyes and mouth appendages and purple-black skin, all she saw was herself. Just another person doing their job, wanting someone to hold.

  Safi clapped its hands together and rose from its seat. “Oh, well! That was a lively discussion. Thank you for your time, Katie Marsh. Our conversation has been most insightful. I would stay but, unfortunately, I must report what I have learned to the Galactic Council.”

  “Will you come again?”

  Safi turned around mid-stride. “I-If you would have me, then, certainly.”

  Katie did not even know what to think anymore. She’d just made friends with an alien. And not just any alien. The alien currently actively plotting to exterminate her species. Was this immoral? Was she a traitor to her species? She didn’t care. All she knew was that she could not wait to see them again.

  The sunlight was almost gone now. When Safi opened the door to the RV, the cool desert night-breeze came rushing in and kissed their faces with a gentle, soothing touch. This too would be gone when the directive was done. Was there no hope for humanity? No way to ‘heal the world’? Maybe, given enough time. But at the rate of one city a day, it would be fruitless by the time anyone decided to step in. It was not fair. But, at the same time, she could not blame Safi. Safi had only seen the good the directive had done. For them, the directive was good and right. It had never failed them before. The humans had to be the ones who were defective.

  Safi stood on the RV’s doorstep and exhaled. They turned to Katie, and spoke with what seemed almost a smile. “Katie Marsh, I look forward to seeing your business ventures in this town. I’m sure you will achieve what you are looking for.” The door slammed shut behind them.

  Katie did not budge from her seat or get up to greet them one last time. She was in enough shock trying to process what they’d just said. After everything they’d been through, all that they’d talked about, they still expected her to proceed with the gift shop? Moreover, how did they know about the gift shop in the first place? Katie had no recollection of telling them. Could they actually read her thoughts? Is that why they approached her in the first place? God.

  This was too weird. Too much weird for one day. Katie needed to lie down for a while. Whatever she was gonna do now would have to wait till tomorrow. The only thing Katie was really sure of was that she wanted to- no, needed to see Safi again. And if the gift shop was the way to go about it, if that was what they wanted for her, then so be it. She was gonna open the best goddamn gift shop a cult could ever wish for.