CHAPTER 13

  "Don't you think you've had enough

  Do their claws make sores

  Take my hand and come away

  And I'll take you home

  I won't turn around

  Can't be afraid

  Takin' you all the way back home

  Innocence gone

  Can't be the same

  Takin' you all the way back home

  Back home

  Will the world still be the same

  Even if you're gone

  When the pillars start to fade

  And the room's just walls"

  -Cold

  Carl had pulled the dust covers off the furniture and moved it back to where it was. He sat on the couch staring out the window. This wasnt home, but it was his home for now. It felt good to be back. He was safe. There was a knock at the door.

  "Carl?"

  It was Penny. He didnt say anything, didnt move.

  "Carl, can we talk?"

  He got up and went to the door, his hand hovered over the knob. No, not yet. He went back to the couch and sat down. He could hear Penny walk away and he exhaled. What had happened with the other Penny was yesterday for him.

  He dragged the boxes over to the couch and started going through them. He found the box with the contents of his nightstand drawer, he found the half joint. He lit it off the stove burner again and smoked. While he smoked, he started unpacking. He dumped the "pocket junk" box into his drawer. There were only two crystals, he had three before...and where was the vial of anti-serum. Shit. If someone got ahold of that it could fuck up this whole world. Superpowers here? They were barely equipped to handle Carl. Imagine someone with ill intentions. He stubbed out the joint on the bottom of his boot and bolted out of the room.

  "Phillip, hey, you got a minute?"

  Royles looked up from the file on his desk.

  "Come in. We dont have to do the report until youre ready."

  "Thats...thank you sir. This is about something else though. I had a vial with purple liquid in it amongst my belongings. Its gone. Its very, very important I get that back. It could be very dangerous for this whole world."

  Royles laid the file he was holding on the desk and fixed his stare on Carl.

  "Explain."

  "I'm hesitant to tell you what it is, but you've been nothing but fair to me, so here goes. Its anti-serum, it removes superpowers from a powered individual. The thing is, it can be reverse engineered. If that gets out..."

  "I understand. Talk to Andy, I had him pack up your stuff."

  "Ok, thanks."

  Carl turned to leave.

  "Carl?"

  "Yeah?"

  "Keep me informed."

  "I will."

  Carl jogged down the hallway, Penny was coming out of her room.

  "Hey Carl."

  He nodded and ran past her to Andy's door, he pounded on it.

  "Andy! Andy this is important man!"

  The door opened and Andy stood there shirtless and half awake.

  "Its like nine in the morning, whats..."

  "Just listen. There was a vial of purple liquid with my stuff. Its missing, do you know where it is?"

  "Uh, no man. I didnt see that. Matt helped me box up your stuff, maybe he saw it."

  "Ok, thanks Andy."

  Carl took off for Matt's lab, running past Penny, who didnt say anything this time. He ran into Matt's lab, where he was bent over a notebook.

  "Matt!"

  "Hey Carl. Listen, I need to tell you something."

  "Fine but not right now. Im looking..."

  "No, its really important Carl."

  Carl stopped talking and looked at the man, something was bothering him.

  "I thought you were gone for good and I took some things from your stuff."

  "Yes! The vial! You still have it?"

  "Yeah. Look, I'm sorry, I..."

  Carl grabbed him in a hug.

  "Its ok, I dont care. As long as that vial doesn't leave this facility."

  Matt looked confused.

  "What is it? I broke down its chemical composition and it...well, it doesn't make sense."

  "I think its safer if I keep that information to myself. That vial could be monumentally dangerous for your world."

  Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  Matt was digging through a drawer stuffed with small plastic boxes. He found the one he was looking for and opened it. The vial sat on a bed of foam. He held it out to Carl, who took the vial and dropped it in his pocket.

  "Its not a virus or anything is it? Because I extracted a small amount."

  "No, nothing like that."

  "Ok. You're not mad?"

  "No man. With your scientific mind, I'd have been shocked if your curiosity didnt get the better of you."

  Matt chuckled.

  "Fair enough. I messed with one of the crystals as well."

  He pointed to a corner of the lab that had scorch marks on the floor and wall. "Whoa."

  "Yeah, it turns out theyre highly volatile. Where did you get these things?"

  "They were growing on the thin spot between your world and the void in between."

  "Hmm...so they've been siphoning ambient energy from this "void" you keep talking about?"

  "I have no idea. I just thought they looked cool, figured a guy I know in my world might like to study them. So, you're telling me I had explosives in my pocket?"

  "Pretty much."

  "Yikes. One wrong move and I could have blown my dick off!"

  "No man, these things would have shredded your whole lower half into hamburger."

  "Jeezus."

  Carl exhaled long and loud, he could relax now. He started to leave, but a humanoid shape under a sheet caught his eye.

  "Whats that?"

  "Oh, you're gonna love this. Matt walked over and pulled the sheet off. There was a half finished suit of hammered steel armor on a stand.

  "This was for Andy. Royles has this engineer thats been helping me with it. We thought you went home man, this was how we were going to keep exploring the rifts. We're still working on weight reduction, right now its too heavy to be worn for very long."

  "Huh. It looks cool."

  Matt smiled,

  "yeah, but its gonna take some time, I'm really glad you're back man."

  "Thanks Matt, its good to be back."

  Carl was walking back down the hallway to his apartment, he could feel the vial in his pocket. Thank goodness that mess was contained. Maybe he should shatter this outside, let it soak into the dirt. That would be the smart thing to do. He heard the familiar sounds of Soundgardens "Fell on black days" and he stopped. How? Then he remembered he had copied some of his albums for Steve. He smiled and knocked on Steve's door.

  The door opened and Steve smiled at Carl.

  "How ya feeling?"

  "Better. Soundgarden huh?"

  "Oh my god, Yes! I love these guys!"

  "Me too. I'm glad you like them."

  "You wanna come in?"

  "Sure."

  Carl entered and sat on Steve's couch.

  "Do you remember me taking pictures of your armor?"

  "Yeah."

  "Even though we thought you had gone home, I finished what I was working on anyways."

  He held up a finger and disappeared into his bedroom, he reappeared holding a canvas stapled to a wood frame. He turned it around and Carl was stunned. Before him was a painting of Carl flying through the air, his claws fully extended, headed right toward the giant bug monster he fought in rift two.

  "Holy crap Steve...you painted this?"

  "Yeah. You like it?"

  "Its amazing! You're really talented!"

  "Thanks. Its for you."

  He laid it against a kitchen chair. He stuck out his hand, Carl took his hand but pulled Steve into a hug.

  "I dont know what to say buddy. I love it!"

  They seperated and Steve walked over to a bowl on his kitchen counter. An open carton of cigarettes stuck out of the bowl. He shook out a pack and threw it to Carl.

  "After you left, I thought I'd try those expensive high-thc cigarettes we talked about. They're incredible man!"

  Carl turned the pack over in his hands, he smiled and looked up at Steve.

  "You got a lighter?"

  Carl leaned back into the couch cushions, inhaling the smoke and letting it curl through his thoughts. The music rattled around the room, familiar riffs that somehow sounded different now, he could hear the spaces between the notes, the tension and release, and it mirrored the chaos he’d just crawled out of. Every chord was a reminder that the world hadn’t ended, even if he felt like it had been shredded and stitched back together in pieces.

  He watched Steve nod along, completely absorbed, and for the first time in what felt like forever, Carl felt untethered from the weight of being trapped in a foreign world, from the horrors he’d seen, from the people he’d almost killed, or had. It was just him, Steve, and the music. A moment that belonged to no universe but this one.

  He let the smoke drift lazily through the room and exhaled. Maybe he wasn’t home yet. Maybe he wouldn’t be for a long time. But here, in this small, shared bubble of sound and quiet laughter, it almost felt like he could breathe again.

  They had moved on to a music stick with assorted Led Zeppelin hits on it. Both men were quite stoned, and both were relaxed enjoying the music.

  "I really needed this man, thanks for hanging out with me."

  "Honestly, I needed it as much as you did Carl. I dont really have much in the way of friends. It gets really lonely living by myself."

  "Anytime you wanna hang, dont hesitate to knock on my door man."

  "I appreciate that. Thank you for not judging me."

  "Judging you? About what?"

  "About the...oh. You dont know."

  "Know what?"

  "I made a mistake a year ago. A lot of people within the department still haven't forgiven me."

  "If you dont want to talk about it, you dont have to."

  "No. You've been nothing but nice to meet, you should know who you're hanging out with."

  "Ok. I won't judge."

  "So, it took me a few years to be made an agent. I was pretty gung-ho back then."

  He had a smile on his face as he reminisced.

  "I had everything going for me, including a friend in a high place. Me and Royles came up through the academy together. I screwed it up."

  "What happened?"

  His face changed, the smile gone.

  "We got called to a hostage situation. It should have been the local PDs jurisdiction, but we were closer and were told to handle it. I was put in charge of the negotiations. The guy was out of control. He had a knife to a womans throat..."

  He looked at the floor, the memories were clearly getting pretty painful. Carl stayed quiet and let him go at his own pace.

  "I had my gauntlet aimed at him, the woman escaped his grasp for a moment and I was given the order to shoot. I-I couldnt do it. I froze. The guy ended up stabbing her. She died before she reached the hospital."

  "I'm sorry. Thats rough."

  "I probably should have been fired, but Phillip lets me stay on."

  "I understand why its a big deal, but man, you didnt want to kill someone. I can understand that."

  "Yeah, but if I had, that woman might still be alive."

  "Yeah, but you didnt comprise your own moral integrity. Even if it was an unwinnable situation. I respect that Steve, I respect that a lot."

  Carl stood back looking at the painting, he had hung it above the TV. It was the first thing you saw when you walked in. He walked right up to it now, examining the detail. Steve was an incredible artist, he had all the armors details exactly right, with one exception. In the painting, Carls helmet was off, his hair in the wind, his teeth gritted, and a firm look of determination on his face. He wondered if this is how Steve saw him, how others saw him. He had never thought about it before. It was distinctly heroic. That felt good, like, really good. So often he was down on himself and his actions. To think that someone perceived him as a good man, a hero even. Maybe he wasnt the monster he felt like sometimes. He walked backwards until his legs hit the couch, never taking his eyes off the painting. He sat down and turned on the TV. He flipped through the channels, but his eyes kept wandering to the image of himself.

  Carl was playing a racing game, he paused it when he heard the knock.

  "It's open."

  Penny walked in, and sat next to him on the couch. He paused the game and set the controller down.

  "Kinda feels like you've been avoiding me."

  Carl could feel the blood rushing to his cheeks. It was hard to look at her without seeing her nude in his memory.

  "Sorry about that."

  "What happened to you out there?"

  He looked down, his mind racing. What did he tell her? The truth? What if she was mad? What if it made it super awkward around her from now on? Fuck.

  "I..."

  He breathed out, grabbed the pack of weed cigarettes off the arm of the couch and shook one out. He walked over to the stove and lit it on the burner.

  "The thing is, you and I, we..."

  He took a drag and blew it out and sat back down on the couch.

  "What I'm trying to say is, I ended up in another version of myself's body. That Carl was married to you, and that version of you...tried to have sex with me."

  "Oh. Oh my."

  "Yeah. I didnt stop it right away...hell, it wasnt even my body, but my mind was there. I did stop it though. I'm sorry. I dont want it to be weird between us now."

  Penny didnt say anything, she just stared into Carls eyes. He was beginning to get uncomfortable when she finally spoke.

  "Married, huh?"

  "Yeah. He was a little thinner and clean shaven, and the other you was blonde."

  "Blonde? Me? Did it look good?"

  Carl laughed.

  "You always look good Penny."

  She tilted her head with a little smile.

  Carls eyes got wide.

  "Shit. I'm sorry. I can't help it."

  She giggled.

  "Carl, I'm not mad. It wasnt me. Also, its ok. I'm attracted to you but I know you're off limits. I won't break that trust. So, you're allowed to say you think I'm pretty. Quite frankly, I appreciate the compliment."

  "You're sure its not weird?"

  "Oh, its totally weird, but I'm not going to let it interfere with our work...or our friendship."

  "Thank you."

  "So...did you like what you saw?"

  She motioned at her body and Carls cheeks started burning again and he stayed silent with a sheepish grin on his face.

  "I'm kidding! But, that tells me everything I need to know."

  She winked at him and got up.

  "I'll leave you to your game. Just remember, you can always talk to me, even if it is mildly embarrassing."

  "Thanks Penny."

  She closed the door behind her and Carl laid his head back and exhaled. That could have gone much worse.